"N- n- now th- that don't kill me, can only make me stronger"

So I got an MRI on Thursday and now I just play the waiting game and hope that my doctor was wrong about my ACL being torn. Honestly, when he first told me it was torn I wanted to cry. Up until my doctors appointment I spent the past 2.5 months thinking nothing was torn and I'd be ok in a couple months. I know it's lame but just thinking about everything I've missed out on and will continue to miss out on for the next 8 months or so. Just in the past 3 months I've missed playing in a basketball league, turkey bowl and playing basketball at the CRC with John and Eugene. Now when my friends from home go to play basketball at church or Thomas Farm, I just feel like I'm left out of that part of their lives (of course its by no fault of their own). I truly to miss playing the game of basketball and it's just something you take for granted when you're healthy enough play. Although these past few months have taught me a lot about what I need to change once I'm healthy enough to play, such as my attitude. I was also fortunate enough to get the opportunity to coach football which I otherwise wouldn't have been able to had I been playing.

A hard thing to get used to is getting surprising or unexpected news. News about my knee as well as news about other things has happened numerous times and has drastically changed my life in recent months. I think no matter how often it happens, I will never get used to getting news like this. Although these may not be the best of times for me personally right now, things could definitely be worse right? After talking with Haomin, she told me I have a lot to be thankful for. I have a new job starting in the new year which means new opportunities and a fresh start. Although right now personally it may not be the best time for me, I was told 'dont fret' and advice like this may seem simple but having the reassurance of the support of my friends means a great deal to me. Forward is the only direction I'm looking and that's where I'm going. I won't dwell on the past (although I'll probably think about it every once in a while) and instead I'll look to whats ahead.


"The best part of getting lost is what you find along the way"


Song of the moment



I spent nights waiting for you
Staring out the window by my bed
These street lights
So unkind to shine upon the emptiness instead

I hang my head
Im down but im not giving up on you just yet
Love, look at me now
What is this feeling people talk about
Love, look at me now
You don't know how long I've been holding out
For you love, look at me now

Some people take you for granted
Softly as you crept into their hearts
Not me though
Just don't leave me stranded
Here with no one in my arms

I'll do my part
I'll stand out in the rain
I'll cry out in the dark

Love, look at me now
What is this feeling people talk about
Love, look at me now
You don't know how long i've been holding out for you love

I make your every wish
My command
If you were drowning
I would bring you back
Back to land

Where do I begin
I'm ready to jump in

Love, look at me now
I've heard so many perfect things about you
Love, look at me now
Maybe your just a shadow of a doubt
Love, where have you been
I wanna fall in
I'm never coming out
For you love, look at me now
Look at me now

I spent nights
Waiting for you
Staring out the window by my bed